Secondary etcd-only nodes do not reconnect to apiserver after outage if joined against an etcd-only node

[brandond]

Environmental Info:
K3s Version:
v1.30.6+k3s1 but earlier releases are affected as well... probably going back to May/June when the load-balancer stuff was last worked on.

Node(s) CPU architecture, OS, and Version:
n/a

Cluster Configuration:
Minimally, 2 etcd-only, 1 control-plane-only.
Will affect any split-role cluster with more than 1 etcd-only node.

Do NOT use fixed registration endpoint, but register all nodes against the first etcd-only node.

Describe the bug:
When all control-plane nodes are unavailable, the apiserver load-balancer on the secondary etcd-only nodes will fall back to the default server, which is the initial etcd-only node. When the control-plane nodes come back, the load-balancer does not close the connections to the etcd-only node, which leaves the kubelet and internal controllers connected to the etcd-only node, continuously logging apiserver disabled errors.

Nov 13 01:56:40 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:40.186329     874 kubelet_node_status.go:544] "Error updating node status, will retry" err="error getting node \"systemd-node-2\": apiserver disabled"
Nov 13 01:56:40 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: W1113 01:56:40.218182     874 reflector.go:547] k8s.io/client-go@v1.30.6-k3s1/tools/cache/reflector.go:232: failed to list *v1.Node: apiserver disabled
Nov 13 01:56:40 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:40.218211     874 reflector.go:150] k8s.io/client-go@v1.30.6-k3s1/tools/cache/reflector.go:232: Failed to watch *v1.Node: failed to list *v1.Node: apiserver disabled
Nov 13 01:56:40 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:40.742852     874 leaderelection.go:347] error retrieving resource lock kube-system/k3s-cloud-controller-manager: apiserver disabled
Nov 13 01:56:41 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:41.411435     874 webhook.go:154] Failed to make webhook authenticator request: apiserver disabled
Nov 13 01:56:41 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:41.411485     874 server.go:304] "Unable to authenticate the request due to an error" err="apiserver disabled"
Nov 13 01:56:43 systemd-node-2 k3s[874]: E1113 01:56:43.621369     874 controller.go:145] "Failed to ensure lease exists, will retry" err="apiserver disabled" interval="7s"

Steps To Reproduce:

1. Start a etcd-only node
2. Start another etcd-only node, joined to the first etcd-only node
3. Start a control-plane-only node, joined to the first etcd-only node
4. Once the cluster is up, restart k3s on the control-plane-only node
5. Note that after a short period of time, the second etcd-only node goes NotReady
6. Restart k3s on either of the etcd-only nodes. Note that all nodes become Ready again

Expected behavior:
All nodes reconnect to apiserver after outage

Actual behavior:
Secondary etcd-only nodes fail over to the default server (an etcd-only node with no apiserver) and get stuck there.

Additional context / logs:
cc @ShylajaDevadiga